yeah, inspiration:

"The Call." Beautifully saddening...

(Italicized means it wasn't changed from the original version. The real lyrics can be found... somewhere else.)

We made our way through the evening
With pockets full of heart
But when you said you were leaving
Those hearts shatterd and tore

And when you turned around, a tear fell
Leading you to cry:

"I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye"

And since I'm home alone now
I keep busy
Though I still am forlorn

All you can do is try to send
Me your Message
As you're off to the war

Pick a flower for me from the sands
And make a wish on us

You'll come back
When it's over
No need to say good bye

You'll come back
When it's over
No need to say good bye

Now we're waiting resltlessly
And a hope bruises by the door
But just because you aren't here yet 
It can't mean you won't come home

Let our memories grow stronger and stronger
'Til they're before our eyes

Please come back
When I call you
No need to say good bye

You'll come back
Like you told me
No need to say good bye

seems to only come out of my own darkness. I cannot get into a book unless there is drear; I cannot write a decent paper unless someone gets hurt; I cannot be happy with fictional depression. Is there supposed to be a balance of Sadness and Happiness in ones' life? Or can we really truly be happy without being sad?

I know people who are only happy when they are sad. They ruin their lives because they want to, because they want sympathy or because they want to be alone. I know people who are only content if the wordl is upside down and there's no hope to be found.

I know people who always seem happy. Everything in their life is basically a fairy tale. I know everyone has problems, but you all know who I'm talking about: The perfect blond, skinny cheerleader, the effortlessly muscular co-worker who doesn't have time to body build because he's excelling at work, the cousin who married rich and has 3 kids while you're fourty and possibly barren for life.

But what about me? The average?

I'll tell you what. I'm happy when there's a balance. One of my favorite Hush Sound songs says, "without the sour, the sweet wouldn't taste..." which is completely and utterly true for all of us. If we are spoiled, we hardly see it. if we have nothing, the littlest things matter.

I have to see depression-- and at times feel the very core of it-- to really be even close to happy.

And that's, maybe, how it should be.